THE COLONIZER WANTS YOU

Artwork by Broobs

Deeply imbedded in our subconscious, there lies a fragile superiority complex that wants to keep us close, one that needs us so that it may thrive. It is not one person, or kind of people but a part of our being today, the world over. Our beliefs, thoughts, actions have all been influenced by the idea of property and our egos have been attached to the reverence of ownership for so very long and in so many ways that it is very difficult to even imagine things differently; but the concept of identifying ourselves sexuality (infact, every conceivable identity for that matter), is the focus on what separates us as opposed to what brings us together and is born out of a primal type of fear - one of the unknown. Our indigenous ancestors called Human Beings did not have any concept of ownership. They experienced the earth, all its features and inhabitants, past/future and present, as an extension of the same being - something called Oneness (meaning whole), and viewed themselves as a unique articulation of this oneness. The ego of the colonizer came from this same idea of oneness but instead of relating to wholeness it has evolved to become the focus on our singularity (what prevents wholeness), and the source of many an imbalance and much illness.


Since it is very unnatural to own something that you come from (nature: our ancestor), let alone something that you see yourself in (humanity: our descendant), our similarities were removed from our focal consciousness so that the colonizer (insert: slavery) could thrive. We are able to own and be owned (yes enslave and be enslaved) ONLY by retaining our preference for our perceived differences - sex, gender, age, race, nationality, size, ability, ethnicity, etc. - all separatist minded observations. Though we are all unique and different in many ways, as human beings we possess far more similarities. Our differences are what could make every single human person an artist; but the colonizer exists as the capitalist idea that any human expression (art) is something to be monetarily valued based on skill and then commodified - a product as opposed to a sacred process meant to invoke spirit and authenticity. Though today’s most prominent example of the colonizer would be the white, American, cisgendered, heterosexual male, the mentality and the pattern of the colonizer is not at all limited to this person nor “white people” as a whole. Ownership is the foundational principle of the colonizer, it is an ancient concept, almost as ancient as our concept of self, and in today’s human experience there are very few ways in which we are shown to be happy without some attachment to the idea of property. The colonizer believes in ownership so passionately that currency has been created to manifest this most heinous and unnatural relationship with the world and all its peoples.


Sexuality, as in the idea of having a sexual identity (or any ID for that matter) or orientation is a concept (one of many in place today) similar to the gender binary which is used to enforce this ownership consciousness and preserve the ego of the colonizer - who fears what it cannot compartmentalize. True freedom being a terrifying experience as much as having an open mind can be fearful and dangerous one to have. Therefore the colonizer’s focus can be found within the (false sense of) security of polarity / aka: repress the spectrum (process) and enforce the binary (polarity). A Heterosexual assumes the ownership of their partners’ sexual expression and gives up ownership of their own, to a body of the “opposite sex”, while a Homosexual agrees to give up ownership of their own expression and have another of the “same sex” own theirs. But your sexuality is yours, it does not belong to another if you don’t want it to, there is no sex same as yours and there is no sex opposite of anyone’s. Asexual orientation is not one of lacking a sexual expression but one of sexual independence, the asexual understands that their expression is not limited to sharing of bodies, of genitalia, as does the Mojosexual - meaning one who encounters the experience of life itself, through their own human body, as a “sexual” one, aka one who experiences all things sex, as spirit.


Though sex is something that is sometimes shared with another body - it is in no way belonged to by that sharing. If every sensation and experience one can have, “sexually” or not, occurs within the body of the experiencer - then sex only truly happens within each of us. And if it happens uniquely within us all as demonstrated by our DNA, then everyone’s sex must be just as complex, as original, and mysterious / a beautiful difference with a sacred purpose to be expressed. Aka everyone has a kink. Sex is not limited to genitalia or activities involving their stimulation. Sex is homeostasis, it is the balanced (or unbalanced) and harmonious (sometimes painful) relationship our body holds with and within itself. It is chemical, ancestral, scientific, mathematic and artistic. Without sexual repression (what the colonizer depends on), there would be no capitalization, no slavery, no “civilization” (all anti-indigenous or indigiphobic concepts). The foundation of our society and concept of self today is dependent on the repression of this truth: sex is who we are. Sex is every second that passes (time), every thought that thinks (consciousness), every action taken (free will), SEX IS KNOWING. And colonization is the unknowing, the dulling, the desensitization, the destination.


Ye Old Books (Bible, Torah, Koran) are full of truths. All three of Abraham’s religions tell the truth but through the colonizers mind, as they were born of the “new reverence”, from the ancient monotheistic consciousness called YHWH (yah-whey) which naturally opposes human Indigineity: being polytheistic by nature, born of reverence for the many infinite forces of nature (human nature, unrepressed). Through our attachment to property we made certain our detachment from nature and have created the pattern that “white peoples” would capitalize on and spread like a virus over time up until today. We have been able to record and repeat true words but have failed to remember that actions speak louder (movement being the language of nature) than words or text. Speaking authentically with yer spirit, with yer being is vibrational and resonates with all else that nature has created. If we were allowed and encouraged to speak naturally, authentically, then the colonizer YHWH would have no food.


Belief truly (ancestrally) means what the body does, not what the head or heart think or feel, aka being as knowledge, not an opinion or a preference. You are what you eat and everything that humans have created externally, is and has always been an extension of what is inside - be it from tools, to weapons, of art, of home, of science of spirit of happiness. Books allow us a glimpse of someone else’s knowledge which does inspire our own to arise; but the only book there is for a Human Being to read is their own body. This is why the foundation of the colonizers success was to eliminate oral history (by perpetually removing its storytellers) and replace it with a written one. Books that would cause more human death and indigenous genocide than any weapon ever created - the Old Testament, the Bible, the Koran. What the colonizer calls sex is also the book of knowing of my people - The Qadex (meaning holy people: from the gendered Hebrew word “ka-desh” / “ka-desha). A once greatly revered indigenous holy people of the ancient Middle East, akin to Two Spirit First Nation people’s of America, they were/ we are The First Gender - the being of the indigenous human (where “knowing” someone, biblically: meaning sexually, comes from). The Qadex were the story tellers of our species, the tree of life that bore the fruit of the gender binary, the link between our ancestors and us. They were entrusted with telling our story through their actions and were honored as holy people for this sacred relationship by the communities they served within.


I am called Hollywood Texas and I am a First Gendered Mojosexual and a keeper of the Tao of the Qadex (the sacred way) - my sex, sexual identity, sexual expression, sexual transitions and gender expression(s) are mine and they do not belong to any other body. I am responsible for my own pleasure and my own happiness and within this human body, possess the necessary ingredients. Balance is mine to pursue but is not a very stable experience by nature - as balance requires constant movement though it may appear to be still. With the deformation of my body: the colonizer intended to removed me from my book of knowledge, and place me within his. I know the colonizer because I was the colonizer, he was my father, he was who I used to be, who I used to want to be and am only ever working very intentionally on decolonizing my being and body from his pattern, in pursuit of my authenticity. Sexual healing is my full time gig and it’s not for money. My body (the indigenous queer body I was born into) was enslaved to him and his ways, over thousands of years, through the mutilation of my infant genitalia so for me, the work of decolonization does not end, it is never finished. Every chain unbroken reveals another, locked up for someone else’s safe keeping. But I no longer believe in achieving my goals, I now believe in focusing on the process necessary to produce my own happiness - And have learned to enjoy the process of breaking of chains.


The Hyper Vigilante,
Hollywood Texas